Until we “find out who’s in there!” Ever since I started feeling a lot more movement a few weeks ago I’ve felt more like I “know” this kid, but it helps a lot to be able to think of them in more a more concrete way. Not just from knowing gender, but from seeing them on the ultrasound. I’ve only had the one ultrasound and it was so blurry and they were just a little beanie shape then.
Not to mention one of my favorite things to do when I’m bored is browse Ebay and BST groups on Facebook and I want to know what I could actually be buying! Plus we set the 20 week ultrasound as when, afterwards, we’d start keeping an eye out for deals on the bigger stuff we need… carseat, baby-putter-inner, cosleeper (because I want to try harder to get this one to not need to sleep ON me from the start), etc.
I think it was just before 17 weeks when I finally started feeling obvious and consistent little kicks and thumps. They’re still almost always down really low and more towards the center. The CNM confirmed at my 17 week appointment that I have an anterior placenta again (was like that with B, not with M, which was so much nicer). So that explains things. They like to stay wedged down there most of the time, at least. On occasion these days I’ll feel something on a side or the top, but it’s much less obvious. I can even sometimes feel them kick from the outside, that is when they don’t stop as soon as I put my hand there!
Starting around 18 weeks I started having some major lower back, posterior pelvic, and sciatic pain. Some days have been so bad I can’t lift anything (I dropped M a few times during the night trying to move her because my lower back muscles literally won’t work), and I can’t stand up unless I can push or pull myself because things are so out of whack. I had a few nights I could hardly sleep because it hurt so much, I could hardly turn over, and was having sharp pain in my thigh and lower calf from the sciatica. I’ve started doing prenatal pilates a few times a week to help combat this, and finally got one of those giant exercise balls (must’ve sold my old one, we couldn’t find it!) and it has helped a TON. Doing some circles on it loosens my pelvis back up and the pain is almost gone now. Phew! Every day was feeling like a battle and I would prefer to not have to do it every day for 5 more months.
Otherwise I’m feeling pretty good. I’m 19 weeks 2 days today. The anxiety has been much better since movement has become consistent, and all worries/fears I’d say are at a normal level for anyone. I still have some nausea hanging around some days, but nothing bad. Some days I don’t have much energy, but then I’ll get a day where I have lots and want to do ALL the things.
Things feel real and very unreal at the same time. This entire thing feels so different, I guess because it’s such a different situation from B and M. Still hard to believe it’s happening since it was such a surprise, but feels totally right too. I’m not worried at all about adding another one. The kids are really excited about it. ❤ ❤ ❤
They still argue over whether it’s a boy or girl. B wants a brother, M wants a sister. I used to feel strongly that it was a girl, but the last few weeks have felt strongly that it’s a boy. At this point I think I’ll be surprised if it’s a girl, but I obviously have no idea!