Remembering Eleanor

 

I knew today was August 1st, but I didn’t even remember the significance of this date until I was reminded by a shared article on Facebook of a somewhat artsy description of going through miscarriage.  The author described her vision of her baby she had so early on, who she knew was a girl named Eleanor.

I have an Eleanor.  She also was going to have curls and big brown eyes.  I could picture her as a toddler so clearly in my head, laughing and playing in the grass.  She was my first baby, and I miscarried her on August 1st, 7 years ago.

I feel guilty that I didn’t remember until this evening.  I know in part it’s because I’m in such a better place now, since M, and prefer not to dwell on the grief I had to live with for too long.  I also have so many dates to remember.  But I am thankful for having seen that article so that I was reminded to spend some time remembering my Eleanor.  I am the only one who can remember her.

♥♥♥

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