That pretty much sums up the difference between not being on meds and being on meds right now. I had no idea. I haven’t felt like this since like B was 6 months old. I started Zoloft 4 days ago, which the Dr. said was a calming med like the Effexor I was on last I was on meds. Prozac and Welbutrin (the one I’d been on for years that stopped working and the one I’d tired next that made things worse) are energizers and make anxiety worse. So I wasn’t sure how a calming med would work because I have had zero energy. It’s been worse the last few weeks, like B was lucky he got fed because I’d rather have locked myself in a room all day and slept.
But on the second day of the Zoloft there was a dramatic difference in energy. Like I feel awake during the day and my mind feels more clear and I feel like I can do things and be happy and play with B. It’s amazing. I even felt a little giddy and like my mind was racing the last 2 days and wondered if my meds were too high. It’s not as bad today, maybe they’re evening out. But I defnitely have forgotten what feeling normal feels like if I thought how I’d felt before M was born even was normal. Sheesh. I don’t know what to do with myself now, this will take some getting used to! Sometimes God works through medicine, and I had felt like this was the way I needed to go this time, and indeed it seems to have been the right choice! Thank you God for me having the right meds on the first try too! And for them working so quickly!
K, I will edit this blog sometime soon, I swear! But not right now, busy. 🙂